The 5oz Foodie

So many things have happened over this past year, some good and some really good... Some things I wrote about and some I shouted from the roof tops... Some of my favorites included Celebrating my Mom's 70th Birthday extravaganza... My bestie's baby sister's wedding... Getting my 2nd TA and then getting statused... Some things I didn't talk about like I think maybe I should, like getting squished for the first time... Last month I decided that now that I am 40, I needed to take a step in honor of my cousin Jana and my Core Sister and get my first ever mammogram... Was I nervous? Yes... Had I heard it was painful? Yes... But I knew what I had to do to make sure my breasts were healthy... For those of you that have no idea what an exam is like. You put on a dressing gown and other than that gown you are unclothed from the waist up... There is this huge machine you stand in front of and it has two panels. The technician places one of your breasts on the plate and adju...

I feel like I am slipping again... Back into the things that I have moved forward from... Some of the past hurts and maybe it isn't that I have slipped back but rather I haven't really worked through them... It's incredible the insight you gain at midnight after watching a Lifetime Christmas Movie... I know people aren't perfect but sometimes they don't think before they speak and it ends up hurting without intention... Of course depending on your frame of mind the hurt can just graze the surface, where it doesn't need more than a band-aid to make it feel better and then there are times where it can feel like you have a gaping wound... Do you just act like it never happened and move forward or do you confront the person, which could possibly cause even more pain and hurt... So you don't say anything and instead of letting it go you let it replay over and over in your mind and that little boo-boo covered with a band-aid gets infected because all you did...

My   Holiday   Bucket   List: Write and mail a letter to Santa... Have an Advent Calendar (preferably from Germany) Go and have my picture taken with Santa Claus String Popcorn (I've never done it) Go see the Christmas Lights at Fort Wilderness See the Candle Light Procession See it Snoap in Celebration See the Castle Lighting (haven't seen it in a few years) See the Osbourne Family Christmas Lights Make handmade Christmas cards Not skip over Thanksgiving decorating (Yes, there is a holiday between Halloween and Christmas) Be thankful... Well, things are rolling along smoothly with my Holiday Bucket list... A few more of the little gems should be coming off by weeks end... This has been a very different kick off to the Holiday season... Usually by the first we have all of our house decorated but sadly things have been chaotic and I haven't gotten much accomplished on the interior while Mom is just rolling along with the exterior... I want ...

Everyone speaks about being thankful today because it's Thanksgiving, but we need to be giving thanks EVERY day... Not just because of a holiday... It's kind of like Valentine's day... When people make a huge deal out of telling someone you love them...  If you wait to do these things to long you can miss out on letting someone know how much they mean to you... musicsongbird

I am thankful for my imagination... It makes me sad that so many adults I know have a hard time using their imagination as adults... Life is so much better seeing the magic in the small things... To hold onto the wonder of things... With that being said, I don't know if I will be continuing blogging daily... I am not looking for people to say nice things and I'm not looking for a reaction at all... I just feel like some days I am just racking my brain to figure out something to write and I just don't feel like I am benefiting from it... It isn't therapeutic for me if I am not feeling something when I write... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for Hot Cocoa and Pillsbury Orange Cinnamon Rolls... It's the simple things in life that can bring happiness...

I am thankful for the Memories I have of my Dad... How sometimes I am busy doing something and a song will play or someone will say something and it brings a smile to my face because it brings Dad close to me again... Musicsongbird

I am so thankful for days off... After working 10 days straight, I was off today and thankfully so because the wicked Migraine monster struck again... Now my body just feels tired... Musicsongbird

I'm thankful for my beautiful fur babies... They are so sweet and loving, even if they have potty issues... They are so smart and they love Mom and I as much as we love them... Today was our Team Thanksgiving and it was so nice for everyone to come together and share special holiday treats and laughter... The craziest thing we had today was, and I am NOT kidding, possum in coon fat gravy... At first I was leery because all kinds of craziness went through my head, but when I tasted it I couldn't believe how good it was... It just goes to show you how can miss out on things in life when you don't take a chance... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for the quiet of evening... I love being able to sit and pray, or write, or dream... To just listen to the world happen around me... There is such Peace and Freedom when you just sit in the stillness and quiet... When you take the time to let the worries of the day just wash away into the night... Musicsongbird

I am thankful that I have the ability to laugh at myself and not take myself to seriously... Some people go through life being so serious and being so critical of themselves and others that they miss out on the joys of life... We only get one go around in this life and it doesn't do any good to be miserable... Misery comes in so many forms... Being hypercritical of others, you know the one that is giving unsolicited advice where you claim to be an expert yet you don't follow your own expertise, than you have your own form of misery... You feel the need to self inflate your own importance... Making excuses and taking the blame on yourself for someone else's indiscretions or mistakes... Punishing yourself for these things that you did not do because you don't feel like you are worth more than that... Guess what... You are... Don't let someone else steal your happiness... Musicsongbird

I am thankful that God puts me in the place where I need to be even if I don't realize I need to be there... I believe God puts us where He wants us, when He wants us there... They are kind of like divine appointments or I call them God spots... He puts me there when someone needs to talk or needs a shoulder or needs someone to cheer them on or congratulate them... He knows when someone is going to need someone next to them and he puts me there... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for the Hallmark Channel and cheesy Christmas Romances... They make my heart melt... Thanksgiving Decorating at Work! DONE!!! I am trying to keep my co-workers from Decorating as long as I can, or at least until Thanksgiving itself... This is my safety board I did for work... When I was younger I thought I wanted to be a teacher... So I guess in reality, I really always wanted to decorate bulletin boards... Musicsongbird

Tonight was rough... I have this horrible habit of wanting to eat all night... It's not that I am hungry... I think it's my way of swallowing my emotions... If I sit and munch I don't have to focus on the emotions I am experiencing... Tonight was no exception having the urge to get up and go grab something, anything out of the fridge... But tonight I didn't... I focused on something else and now that it is time for bed... I am ready... It's not going to happen over night but the fact is... it will happen... I will succeed... I am thankful for strong will... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for two fantastic Brothers... I love them both very much... Some days you just need time with a good friend and some yummy food... From laughter to tears and back to uncontrollable laughter a good friend is an amazing thing to have... Musicsongbird oh! BFF... I found Cricket ;)

I am thankful for my Health Insurance and the life care benefits we are offered at work... Not only is our insurance a good value the Life care benefits that are open to all employees are there to help with all over health... Without them I probably wouldn't feel the way I do today... Mentally healthier and happier... Now I am not going to say I am 100%, but I am much closer than I have ever been because I have faced the trauma's of my childhood and realized that I am not a victim but a survivor... With that being said, that doesn't mean I have completed all of my battles, but the biggest one has been faced and called for what it was... NOT MY FAULT!!! As I continue my journey I am realizing little things a long the way... This past weekend I realized that I am more like my Mom than I have ever admitted and I don't mind... She may not see it but we both have infectious smiles and giggles... When we are hurt emotionally, we hurt deep... We are passionate about the ...

I am thankful that I have a boss that allows me the time to talk when needed and is a great encourager and supporter... I did something crazy tonight that I never thought I would do... I volunteered to be on a committee with our Home Owners Association... I have been going to the meeting with Mom for over a year and they are usually a lot of complaining about what isn't going right in the park and that there aren't enough members and so on and so forth... Well tonight when they asked for a committee to help with ballot counting for the upcoming board election I volunteered... I guess I have just gotten to the point where I realized that the only way things are going to change where we live is if I am a part of that change... I would have to say the average age of our HOA board is 65... The same goes for the membership that come to the meetings... The problem is that the people that are moving into the Park are younger and may not relate to the older members coming and askin...

I am thankful for the freedom I have found from my past... I am still healing but I am so much happier... It is time... Time to make some REAL changes... I am tired of talking and not doing... I have made my Christmas Bucket and it's crazy that I am making a genuine effort to fulfill all of those items on the list, but when it comes to my health... Well, it's just the same old same old... I want to say something about this though, I live pretty much out loud on Blogger but I think, while I appreciate the concern but this isn't something you can do for me...  If I have questions on how you have fought your battle, I will ask, but please don't try and tell me how to fight my battle... Fight on... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for my home... It may not be a mansion but it is a place that I feel safe in a place I want to be and it is open and inviting to my family and friends... Weddings are always a great time of celebration and love... It is just so incredible to be special enough to that couple to be asked to be a part of the day...  My most incredible things I have ever seen at a wedding happened this weekend... I saw the sand ceremony in lieu of a unity candle... There was a very special Mother daughter moment during the ceremony as well and then my most favorite part of the whole celebration was at the conclusion of the reception... The DJ brought the newlyweds to the center of the dance floor and had the remaining guests all circle around them holding hands as the song, "Don't Stop Believing," played...  These few simple things made it just that much more special... Musicsongbird 

I am thankful for my borrowed family...and tacos ;) Today was so incredible watching two families become one... I am honored and blessed to been given the opportunity to be a part out it... I love how everyone makes Mom and I feel like we are at home... The hugs and love are in abundance from the family we see relatively often and the family we see at these special times together... I am truly blessed... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for being reunited with old friends... This is such a whirlwind weekend... I have to admit it is nice to get to relax while waiting to attend my borrowed sister's wedding tomorrow...To have the opportunity to see new places and share them with my Mom... I am sad that we aren't getting to spend more time with BFF, but he's a part of the wedding party and it is HIS baby sister getting married so it's OK, plus he promised me at least one dance at the reception... So.... Bucket List update!!! My   Holiday   Bucket   List: Write and mail a letter to Santa... Have an Advent Calendar (preferably from Germany) Go and have my picture taken with Santa Claus String Popcorn (I've never done it) Go see the Christmas Lights at Fort Wilderness See the Candle Light Procession See it Snoap in Celebration See the Castle Lighting (haven't seen it in a few years) See the Osbourne Family Christmas Lights Make handmade Christmas cards Not sk...

I am thankful for the special days with my Mom... I had one of those, I can't believe I live in Florida moments again today... As I gazed out over the gulf and watched the waves roll in, I just felt like everything was right in the world... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for the 24 years I had with my Dad before He went to Heaven...Today Dad would have been turning 74... In short... I miss him a lot... but I know He would be proud of me and my brothers for who we have become... Musicsongbird

I am thankful for the clouds in the sky... Never have a I seen such amazing clouds as I have here in Florida... They truly inspire me and bring peace... My Mom once told me that she heard clouds described as the dust from God's feet... Even the dust from His feet is amazing... Musicsongbird (They are all photos I took)

I am thankful that I have an infectious laugh... I love the mornings when I stop at the Security Gate and I am teased by the sweet old guys working the gate... They just make me giggle and laugh and that is an incredible way to begin the day... I also love the days where laughter is throughout the day... Today there was laughter in our office all afternoon and it just makes it a better more comfortable working environment... And of course when you spend the evening laughing and spending time with good friends, it's just the icing on the cake... Musicsongbird

I am thankful that I have a Mom that can see things in a different way and has mad skills with a hand saw... ;) Today was so incredibly fun and crazy... I got the opportunity to meet my 6 new Germany Cast Members and 6 of my 7 Norway Cast Members... I told them all from the start that they were my first group since becoming a COT and they were so welcoming and fun... I am really looking forward to seeing how they all grow as cast over the next 12 months... Crazy enough they are with us until my Birthday next year... Well, it's another early one tomorrow and I am so sleepy... Sweet dreams, Musicsongbird

I am so thankful I have an amazing job, working for an amazing company.... With that being said, boy did I have a crazy day at the amazing job... I had a total of 6 new cast members from 2 different locations in different stages of their training and their areas are on two different sides of the park... When I took two of the trainees to get costumed and clock out, one of my co-workers watched the others that were still finishing e-learning and sent them over to me at costuming as they were finished... When I finally got down to my one remaining trainee he still had one more online training to complete and it was already 1:30 and I still hadn't eaten... So when another one of my co-workers heard that he took over for me so I had time to eat my lunch before i would need to take my trainee back to costuming...  Even though I didn't get a ton of work done today, I had to opportunity to get to know 6 wonderful people... I was extremely blessed by one of the gentleman I train...

The countdown to Christmas has officially begun... Hallmark Channel is showing there fantastic Christmas movies all day and night and new Christmas Movies every weekend through Christmas... Some may think they are mushy and predictable but I think I like the fact that there isn't all the sex and bad language; it's just good old happy endings...  This holiday season I want to really celebrate... Celebrate the time with Friends and Family and give from the heart... My Holiday Bucket List: Write and mail a letter to Santa... Have an Advent Calendar (preferably from Germany) Go and have my picture taken with Santa Claus String Popcorn (I've never done it) Go see the Christmas Lights at Fort Wilderness See the Candle Light Procession See it Snoap in Celebration See the Castle Lighting (haven't seen it in a few years) See the Osbourne Family Christmas Lights Make handmade Christmas cards Not skip over Thanksgiving decorating (Yes, there is a ho...

The one thing I regret most about going to the doctor is the weigh in, because I know it will be followed by a lecture... Well, I think good doctors know when the topic of conversation needs to focus on the current issue and not the reacurring one...  Not only did she not mention the weight she told me that my BP is good and she got down to determining what the cause is for my anemia and migraines...  Here is to getting healthy from the inside out... Musicsongbird 

Happy Halloween everyone! I had a great time celebrating at work today and seeing the whopping 11 kids that stopped by tonight... But it was fun to see the itty bittys come through all dressed up... Then of course the traditional late dinner at Steak n' Shake, a Halloween tradition... Falling asleep at the keyboard... Musicsongbird

Sometimes the hardest thing for us to do is ask for help... Especially when you are used to taking care of yourself or you think that asking for help makes you look weak or like you have failed in some way... I think it takes more courage to ask for help than it does to have to suffer through avoidable problems... As someone who has had to ask for help many many many times throughout my life, I know how hard it is to swallow my pride and let others know I am struggling but I believe it makes you more aware when others are in need of help and are afraid to ask, that way I can offer my help to help take some of the akwardness away from them... Anyway, don't be afraid to ask for help... Musicsongbird

I have some amazing friends as I have said many times over... Today we all came together to celebrate the return of our sweet Sister to work after her Battle with cancer... It was such an incredible hour this morning to get to see her and see the outpouring of love from everyone... We laughed and joked and she thanked us all and said the jokes are OK, because it makes recovery easier... Having been through the cancer battle with my dad, the hardest thing to make someone realize is that it's good to laugh once in awhile... Even though cancer is a very serious disease, laughter truly is the best healer... If you are emotionally healthy you will be less stressed and less stress is always a benefit... As a friend of mine reminds us all daily at work... Every day is a gift... Musicsongbird

At the beginning of the month I told about my amazing cousin that lost her battle with cancer... Tonight I am telling the story of a friend of mine that is a survivor... Earlier this year my friend was asked if she wanted full time as a core trainer and at one point it was something she definitely wanted but when the position became available she had changed her mind... She felt like she had other things happening in her life and full time didn't fit into them anymore... Then around August she was approached to be one of the Core trainers for the Food and Wine Festival and as honored as she was to be asked she declined... Then I received a phone call last month from her telling me the news that she had found a lump and it was cancer... From the time our work family was told until she went on leave was maybe two weeks... She made the decision that since cancer was found in one breast that she would have both of them removed... I have never seen a woman more confident in her de...

I read this great article tonight about the 10 worst habits for people trying to lose weight and I think I should share them, along with my take on the list... #10 - Stop calling it a diet... When we call it a diet you get it in your head that when you have something that isn't a part of your "diet" you have been bad and really the first three letters in Diet are DIE... So STOP calling it a Diet... #9 - Overhauling your eating habits over night... The fat didn't get there over night and the bad habits didn't start overnight... Think about it this way: imagine a snowball, it's about the size of a baseball... Now in order to make a snowman you have to start rolling it in the snow... As you roll it, it starts to get bigger because more snow is adding itself to your tiny snowball...And before you know it you have the base of your snowman ready to go... You need to think of your eating habits in this way too... Start off small... If you drink 2% milk switch...

My birthday weekend has come to an end and I have to say this was a great month... Going to dinner and taking the road trip was nice but the memories made and the great conversations had is what made it so memorable... As I have said a bunch of times before, I am so excited to see what is to come in this year... What celebrations I will be a part of and adventures I will have... Here is to another year! Musicsongbird

I survived it and lived to tell about it... And you know what? 40 really doesn't feel any different from 39... However, it does make you think about getting older... I know every birthday we get older it's just that milestone birthdays really make you reflect on what you have done and what you still would like to accomplish... Last week a very special friend called and left me an incredible message really just encouraging me to look beyond the outside appearance and help me to remember that your true beauty shines from within... You can have the most beautiful person in the world and if they have a horrible outlook on life and the world around then and they are never happy than their outer self will begin to match their inner self... I know many people like me and that I have an infectious laugh and smile, as I was told by this friend as well as BFF, and I need to remember that when I start to get down on myself about my current size (28)... With all of that being said, my ...

It's fabulous being 40! I had a super fun birthday with Mom and BFF... We had a quick breakfast at Wawa and then we hit the road for Sarasota! There wasn't a total plan in place but I did have some specific food requests for the day... Normally I have things planned out for the entire trip but this time it was lets visit the food places as planned for lunch and dinner but lets just see where the day takes us for the rest... I think I spend too much time planning every second that I need to learn to let go and go with the flow... I am working on an updated bucket list so more to come, but for now this old lady is off to dreamland... Musicsongbird

My last Blog... As a 30 Something... When I wake up in the morning I will be entering the next decade of my life... It's funny when I tell people that I am turning 40, because I get one of two reactions... 1st Reaction: NO WAY!!!! You can't be that old. You're lying... ( yes because I would say I am older than I am ) And my favorite: Don't take offense, but I thought you were in  your late 20's... ( Really? You think that telling me I look at least 10 years younger than I am is offensive??? ) 2nd Reaction: Oh turning 40 isn't bad. 30 was fine, 40 was fine, but at 50 you are like, I BETTER MAKE A LIST! So, I have been thinking for the past week for the best memory that I have had in my 30's and there have been so many but as of recent the best most happiest memory I have is my Mom retiring and moving down to live with me... It isn't always easy because life living with your adult child can't be all of the time, but I wouldn't change...

I am loving that I am turning 40... I have loved being in my 30's but 40 just seems like a new adventure... Tonight I went to trivia night with some of my friends and it was a blast... Our team name was Oh No! Guess who's 4-0! And about half way through the contest the trivia guy came over to our table to see who's Birthday it was... When he returned to his table he had everyone in the bar raise their glasses and do a group toast for me, wishing me a happy 40th Birthday! Then a guy from one of the other teams came over and told me I do NOT look 40, he thought I was in my late 20's... I just wanted to give him a big old kiss, but I settled for a picture together... We didn't come in first, but we did come in 4th but it was out of 8 teams, so I think we did pretty good... :) To my friends that couldn't make it tonight, I missed you a lot but we will schedule another one so we can all be together... And come in 1st place this time!!! I have made some incred...

I think one of the coolest things I have had the opportunity to do in the past 10 years was step into a recording studio to record my own album... In 1998 I graduated from Webster University with a degree in Music... I have sang in church for years and it's something I love very much... Anyone that knows me well knows how much I love singing, especially music by Sandi Patty... When I decided to move to Florida, Mom decided that I couldn't move without recording a CD... So I found a recording studio that was reasonably priced and scheduled my session... I didn't quite know what to expect when I walked in but at the same time, it was everything I thought it would be and more... The engineer took me to one of the studios and had me sit on this incredible leather couch while he prepared my accompaniment CDs that I had brought with me... He also offered me bottled water... Once he was ready he took me into the sound booth and explained how everything worked... He showed me h...

If you would have told me 10 years ago that my middle Brother and one of my best girlfriends were going to be married to each other, I probably would have laughed in your face... But three years ago, my sister by choice became my sister-in-love... Back when she was living in another city years ago she asked me if I thought she should move back home to the STL... Of course missing her terribly I thought it would be great and it would also give her piece of mind since she is an only child and she could be closer to her parents... Upon moving back she found a condo and being a fantastic friend I offered to clean the worst rooms in the house...The bathrooms... I also volunteered my brother to help with some carpentry type projects around the place as well... (But I am sure he will say he offered to help)  They struck up a friendship and my sister-in-love will attest the fact that it was JUST a FRIENDSHIP, nothing else and of course I believe her because she is a terrible liar... ...

Probably one of the biggest things to happen to me in the last decade is getting to the root of my emotional history and getting medical assistance for my depression... For so many years there was a certain stigma attached to people that suffered from depression... That it wasn't real, that they weren't finding their true happiness and they just needed to snap out of it... In my mind I knew if I admitted that I was depressed than they would expect me to go through therapy and they would dope me up until I couldn't feel anything... Well that wasn't true... BFF helped me realize I needed to talk to my doctor because honestly, I just wasn't happy... At work no one could tell that on the inside I was miserable... I was still the laughing, crazy, magical me that everyone expected... However, when I was home I was sad and depressed... BFF put up with a lot, he was an amazing support... When I finally went on Meds I didn't tell anyone for awhile... Not ever BFF, be...

Well... Some may look at the glass in my hands and see it as a cool and refreshing glass of water... I look at it for what it is... A $7 glass of Japanese Sake... This was one of the items on my bucket list... To try Sake... This was my first and last glass of Sake... Mom and I both partook of the liquid madness... Mom said it best after she tried it and then decided it tastes just like rubbing alcohol... Other items still on my list is to fly in a helicopter, ride in a hot air balloon, get a professional facial, go Skinny Dipping, have a souffle, get another tattoo and so on... Something huge I did that was on my list in the past 10 years was living out my Disney dream... Packing up all of my earthly possessions and moving here to Florida to work for the most Magical Company on Earth... Cheers... Musicsongbird

Well, the verdict is in... I am feeling like ME again!!!! I received a sweet and meaningful text from my BGF in St. Louis today... It said this: Happy Last week in your 30s!!!!!!!! Yes, I am spending my last week as a 30 something and I think I want to reminisce about my life over the past 10 years... For my 30th Birthday, Mom and I took an amazing trip with my Uncle, my Dad's baby brother, first to our nation's capital... We stayed in Virginia on a military base, which was really cool... While visiting Washington DC we visited all of the landmarks including a trip up into The Washington Monument... We were also able to go into the viewing areas above congress but much like now, nothing was really going on... ;) We visited Arlington Cemetery and saw the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier... Along with the Memorials at night... Just an amazing trip in itself... Following DC, we drove to New Jersey and met up with my Aunt and Cousin and spent a few days taking the subway acr...

After a return to work, which I don't know was good for me or not, I came home to take an hour long nap and I am finally starting to feel like me again... :) Sometimes getting back to your regular day to day activities is just what the doctor ordered... So thank you all for your thoughts and prayers... Back to my regularly scheduled life... Musicsongbird

I hate waking up feeling sick... When I went to get up this morning the whole world spun out of control... I thought if I slept a little things would get better, but when it came down to having to get up and get ready, it just wasn't happening... So back to bed and more sleep... The dizziness has gotten better but I am still not sure how I am feeling... There is nothing worse than not knowing what's going on in your body... If I feel like this tomorrow, it will be time to call the doctor... prayers please... Musicsongbird

To my dear friend that called and left me the voice mail today... Thank you... You said I probably get a bunch of support, but not like the beautiful words you said to me... The moment you said them, tears jumped to my eyes and my heart overflowed...I didn't doubt your words once... I saved your message and have already listened to it like 4 times and it brings me to tears every time and I believe it for myself a little more each time... If you can't think of any friends that live up to that last statement... Then maybe you haven't found true friends... Thanks for making me see what you see Friend... Musicsongbird

I saw this and it totally made me laugh, because this is how I feel when I over indulge... Like the fat cat stuck with my head in the cookie box... I have fallen of the proverbial wagon so many times that they have an assigned seat for me on the edge, so it's more like a jump off than a fall... I don't even know if I think of it as falling so much as it is giving up... There is no easy fix... There is no one size fits all, if there was than we would all be as skinny as Heidi and Naomi and all of the other fashionistas of the world... I wish it could be as easy Alice, eat this it will make you smaller, drink this it will make you bigger... My friends and I used to imagine a product called ultra super slim fast, where with one drink you are picking your pants up off the floor because it made you instantly thin... But we never thought about the fact that we didn't eat a Big Mac one day and go from a size 8 to a 28... It took a lot of Big Macs and Whoppers and cookies...

A day of much needed rest... Waking to another migraine is no fun... After running two needed errands it was back to bed for much needed rest... Listen to your body... Musicsongbird

I have an amazing best friend and Mom... My Birthday Month surprises continued this morning... While we were at breakfast at Wawa this morning, I was prompted to look at my My Magic Plus app on my phone to see what the day had planned for me... To my surprise it showed dinner Reservations at Shutters, a restaurant at the Caribbean Beach Resort at Disney... I wouldn't have ever thought about going the, probably because when BFF and I started taking vacas to WDW we stayed at the Caribbean twice and the menu was different and i wasn't such an adventurous eater like I am now... But I can officially say after eating there that it was absolutely delicious and I would most definitely go again... The sweetest part of the entire evening is when BFF explained why he chose it... He said that because we had stayed at the resort a couple of times and we had eaten at the Shutters at the Vero Beach Resort, he wanted us to be able to reminisce about those past trips and try something new...

Tonight the TV show Glee memorialized Finn Hudson, who had been played by actor Cory Montieth, until his death this summer... I was a beautiful tribute to the character of Finn... The music was incredibly heart wrenching and I'm sure I am not alone when I say that I cried from the moment Mercedes' music began until the screen went to black at the end of the episode... I admire the writers of Glee for how they handled his passing, by not putting a name to it's cause; despite everyone knowing the actual cause of Cory's death... I know the cast were following their scripts, but I believe their emotions were true... The one thing I wish they would have played was a montage of Finn's character, perhaps with "Don't Stop Believing" as the background music... That was the song that started it all for the show and I believe it is the one everyone that is a fan remembers the most... This show allowed us as fans, a true opportunity to mourn Cory's pa...

Why is it that when a young star does something inappropriate by most people's standards, others make excuses for them like, oh they are growing up or it's kids these days...  Maybe I'm a prude or getting old, but I just don't understand why these 20 somethings think they need to suddenly show their "maturity" by acting like idiots... My favorite is when even their parents "support" them via social networks... If I had acted like some of these "celebri-tots" do when I was their age, my parents would not have jumped to applaud me for being an "individual" or my "talent."  If you are truly talented, why all the gimmicks? Why do they need to act like a thug, or stripped down to nothing but a smile to prove they are talented? If you are truly something special, let your talent speak for you... That's why I love Contemporary Christian artists... Yes I enjoy the worshipful music but I love the modesty, letting the music...

I had a great day meeting 4 new cast for my locations... I was able to pick them up from their Park tour and take them to their locations so they could meet the chef, since they are culinary... It was nice because listening to the chef talk to them at their first meeting I am not only learning more about my new cast member, but I am also learning more about the processes my culinary cast go through each day... I have watched Hell's Kitchen for many seasons and short of the language that is bleeped, the respect for the Chef is real... My cast were yes Chef and no Chef... It was very much like the military... When you address a senior ranking official it isn't, "Hey Bob, what's up?" "It's good morning, Sir or Good morning  Colonel..." It's just so very different... And it's a part of my new home... Musicsongbird Do you think people are afraid to bring treats for the Chef???

There is nothing more beautiful then a blank page... It holds such promise... A blank page can be turned into anything from an amazing work of art, to a literary adventure, prose of a poet, music to a symphony, a child's drawing, a love letter... A blank page is kind of like your life... When you are born everyone around you thinks of amazing ways to fill your blank pages, but in the end you are the author... What is amazing is that even though the stories can take many avenues, different twists and turns... An incredible cast of characters, some starring and some just fleeting in the background... There can be many chapters, some long and some short, but the story will last a lifetime... Make your story a best seller... Musicsongbird

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month 1 in 8   Number of women that will be diagnosed with Breast Cancer in their lifetime. Ranks #2   -Second leading cause of death among women. 2,150   Men will be diagnosed (though it's rare.) 410   Men will die... 220,000  Women diagnosed in the United States with breast cancer each year. 40,000  Women will die... It is scary to know that Breast Cancer is the most common cancer among women worldwide... The one thing that can fight it is attention... We need to pay attention to our bodies... We need to do self exams, both men and women... We need to have regular doctors visits... Ladies, if you have a family history or are age 40, you need to have a mammogram every year... We have lost to many Grandmothers, Mothers, Aunts, Sisters and Friends to this horrible disease... In my family I lost an amazing cousin... What started out as breast cancer spread througho...

Right now, I don't feel like I really have anything to talk about... No words of wisdom, no cute anecdotes... I just feel like there is time to talk and a time for silence... Tonight must be one of those silent ones... So I will leave you with this... Musicsongbird

Oh what a great day... It's nice to have a day off and hangout with the BFF... However, I am excited to be going back to work tomorrow because I am loving my new (old) home and I still haven't had the chance to truly get settled in, so I am hoping I can accomplish some of that tomorrow... To all of my friends I am asking for prayer... The numbness in my hands is back accompanied by pain in my wrist and thumb joint at times... My pin doctor is treating it but I know God is the great physician and He can do anything... Musicsongbird

I love going to Acupuncture but most of the time I sleep so good when I am being pinned that I have trouble going to sleep at night... Thankfully I don't work tomorrow but I do get to spend time with BFF and Mom... Since October is my Birthday month and this year is a milestone one, BFF decided to do a mini-version of what we did for Mom, for me... Tonight he bought me dinner and it was so very sweet... He also told me that he had a secret that he was keeping from me... After many doubtful moments, he decided to share his secret... So apparently a week ago when we were at Tybee, he woke up in the middle of the night to me snoring and he recorded me so that I could hear it later... The next morning he said he felt bad and wasn't going to tell me... Well, a week later he finally did... In my head I had mixed emotions about it, but at no time was I mad about it... And as I have had time to process it, I think it is very sweet to do this for me... Now some of you may be saying,...

A very sweet friend of mine helped me look into myself with an incredible incite... She said, " I know you want to loose the weight, and i know it hasn't been an easy journey. You, my dear, need to realize you are worth the time effort and dedication. With all you have done in the past year I've known you I have seen a lot of self growth, but you still have quite a bit of self doubt. Your weight, I feel, is a protective barrier for you. You'll have to loose it the good old fashion way, diet, exercise, and self determination." This is such a huge truth...For so long I have worried about everyone else and had given up on myself... Well, no more... I have to matter to me as much as I matter to others... Musicsongbird

I did pretty good today and feel even better tonight... Weird and a little bit creepy thing happened after work tonight... I was driving to meet up with friends for trivia night and happy hour and bee bopping along to the music on the radio when a Taxi Van pulled up along side of me in traffic... I noticed the guy was looking at me almost like he was trying to get my attention, but I just kept singing along to the music... The traffic started moving again and he pulled in behind me... At the next stop light I noticed he had put his car in park and had jumped out of his van walking towards me... I lowered the window slightly and he pushed his business card at me and said, "call me," and then went back to his van... At this point I was freaked out and he stopped following me, thankfully or I would have had to keep driving...Maybe he thought I was cute or maybe he thought I could use a cab at some point, but this was just weird...There wasn't anything on his card except ...

One more time I just want to say Happy Birthday to the best Mom in the world... I have really enjoyed getting to spend the past week with you celebrating you... Now back to me... Lol! A Text I sent earlier today : I ate too much again... :(  I've had it... I am worth so much more than this... I have hit an all time high and it is making me sick... I don't mean emotionally sick but physically... I am having a horrible time sleeping at night... I am having heartburn (which I have never suffered from)... I have a lack of energy... I am having a hard time fitting into clothes that I just purchased a few months ago and still looking nice...  The numbness is back in my hands and forearms... And the headaches/migraines have been happening more frequently lately... I can't do this anymore... I deserve better than this... Musicsongbird

Another great day spending time with my Mom... Her 70th Birthday is tomorrow and I love that I have been able to celebrate with her over the course of this last month... This morning at church was especially sweet because she hates when people know it's her birthday and each week the pastor always asks who's birthdays are in the coming week... Well, Mom certainly wasn't going to raise her hand so I did the very adult thing and started pointing over her head to get the pastor' attention... When the pastor announced to the congregation that it was her birthday her reaction was to sweet for words... She had the biggest smile on her face and not a shed of embarrassment was showing... I love these little moments when I see pure joy in her face... It makes me feel so good to see her so happy... I am very thankful that Mom decided to retire and move down here with me and I am thankful I get to celebrate her... Musicsongbird

I guess I can mark one more thing off of my bucket list...  Giving yourself a bloody nose... CHECK! So of course there is a story to go with this, however I feel like the biggest dork... So this morning I woke up with the onset of  one of my fantastic migraines... So I took allergy meds and drank a bunch of water in the hopes it was just from hunger or the ever changing weather forecast... Mom and I did some running around getting groceries and stuff and upon returning my head wasn't any better... I then decided it was time to try the netty pot... After flushing out my sinuses I started to feel better, but I figured I should finish it all off with a sinus spray...I sprayed the one nostril and just as I was about to spray the second, my fingers slid off the sides of the bottle and I crammed the sprayer up my nose which caused my first ever honest to goodness nose bleeds... I quickly grabbed tissues and put my head back and Mom grabbed me an ice pack... Within min...

What an amazing way to begin my day... I awoke to the alarm at 6:30 am... I quickly got dressed and headed down to the beach from our hotel room... It was so quiet and peaceful except for the rolling waves going in and out... I turned on some music on my phone and enjoyed a mini worship session as the sun began it's ascent into the morning sky... The beach also began to fill as the sun made it's way up... People from all around made their way on to the beach to enjoy the incredible morning... When I made my way back toward the hotel, I noticed the drier sand, racing it's way across the wet sand, in what reminded me of snow drifts on the road just after a fresh snow... It was incredible... Musicsongbird

Sometimes things happen that are out of your control and all you can do is know that God has a plan greater than you... I had a moment sitting on the balcony with the waves crashing on the beach and darkness around me... I began to cry... And then the door opened to the balcony and my Mom came out... We talked a bit, I cried a bit and then she reassured me that everything was fine and that we can get through anything together... This has been an incredible Birthday trip with my Mom and BFF and I realized a lot about me and my little family here in Florida...    This is my family. I found it all on my own. It's little and broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good. As long as we have each other, that is all that matters...I love them and nothing will change that... Musicsongbird

What a fun day... All diet thoughts were gone, but I don't really think I was that off the path... Breakfast at Wawa and then the revealing of Mom's mystery trip... Da da da daaaaa!!!!!!!!! Tybee Island!!!!!!!!!!! She was very excited and happy and we were on our way... The trip was long but quite enjoyable... Bad jokes, bad singing and big laughs... We are in a Ocean facing room on the top floor (4th) of our resort... It is an amazing view and the sounds of the waves crashing outside is incredible... Just sitting and listening the waves makes a person feel so small... So excited to see what happens tomorrow... Musicsongbird

I am very excited for tomorrow... Taking Mom on a Birthday adventure... I don't want to give anything away so I will just say this...  I love my Mom very much and I am so happy she moved down here and that I get the opportunity to spend time with her everyday... Time to wrap up the preparations for tomorrow! Musicsongbird

There is nothing worse than having to buy new bras and going into the fitting room with that floor length mirror so you can watch yourself struggle to get a band of elastic to rotate around your mid section that may or may not be the right size for you and then struggle to get the straps up and afraid you are going to destroy this item of unpurchased clothing before you even get it on... Then to make matters worse, I am looking at this person in the mirror that is struggling horribly and I feel bad for her and I see how much added weight she is carrying around and then I snap back in reality when I accept that the poor woman is me... All I can think is, how... How did I allow this to happen? How did I let myself get to this point... And I can't think of one thing in response... I have no viable defense for what I have allowed to happen to my body... What I have allowed food to become to me... I know it didn't happen over night and I think about all of these years that it ha...

New / Old work location, but new mindset on how I need to live... How I need to treat myself and my body... I am tired of the struggles and tired of just being tired... I need to make my mind up and not turn back... The struggle comes into play when things get labeled... It gets harder when people start to notice changes because if you mess up than they are quick to point that out, but not necessarily to your face... Oh no, it would be rude of them to say that you have fallen off the wagon to your face, but they will say it behind your back... I know because I am the pot calling the kettle... And I am ashamed... I have no room to talk to put down someone else's battle... I should be encouraging them not enabling them... Something I still need to work on and do better at is excepting a compliment when it is given... I still struggle with this... I need to learn to say thank you and not ignore them or blow it off... Sometimes others see things we don't and we should thank the...

I hate when I wake up and all I want to do is go back to bed because I am just that tired or my head hurts that badly... That is what happened today... However I had a very important breakfast date with Mom and BFF for part 3 of Mom's 70 th Bday celebration... We ate at the Polynesian and it was delicious... We also informed Mom that she has 3 days to back her suitcase for a 3 day and 2 night mystery trip... It could be anywhere, but she won't be given any clues as to where it is... When we returned home I was back to bed for a few hours in hopes that the head pain I was experiencing would subside, however when I awoke it was still there... In fact it didn't go away until almost 7pm tonight... After a fantastic PartyLite Party combination HouseParty.com party, I'd say over all it was a fantastic day. Musicsongbird

Over done... My head is reeling... Over did it at work I think so it's early to bed... Take care of you... Musicsongbird

I am having such a good time celebrating my Mom's 70 years and the fun isn't over yet... It's a month long celebration... What better person is there in your life that deserves to be celebrated... Mom and I were talking tonight and she said this is the best Birthday she has had in her adult life... I was shocked to hear her tell me she had not had a birthday party since she was a little girl... My favorite Birthday story of hers is when she was in the 6th grade.  She invited all the kids at school over and didn't tell my Grandma... Thankfully Grandma always made a cake for her birthday so everything was OK... So very often people are so wrapped up and worried about what our parents will do for us, that as we forget to do for them... Our parents give so much of themselves to us and never expect anything in return... I just want mine to know how much she means to myself and my brothers and those around her... It's not her birthday yet, but then again... I shou...

Never stop learning... When you choose not to learn something new because it seems hard or impossible is when you give up on yourself... You are worth more than that... Others may give up on you, but you should never give up on yourself... If people get mad or upset with you for trying to make your life better, than those are the people you shouldn't be around... You want to surround yourself with people that will lift you up not tear you down... Love and support you for who you are not what you can do for them... Live each day to the fullest, have no regrets... So many of us regret not saying things to people that have left our lives, either by walking or running away or by divine intervention... We can't base our whole life on what if... We have to learn to love and forgive ourselves and realize what has past is the past and all we can do is look to the future... Now don't misunderstand what I am trying to say... Forgiving yourself doesn't mean you have done any...

Another day gone and done... Meeting new people, reuniting with old... And there are still so many people to see and things to learn...  Today I was again told by co-workers that they couldn't wait for me to come back... It still feels amazing... If the moment hits you and you want to compliment someone or pass on encouraging words to them; don't let that moment pass you by... Because sadly enough, you don't know if you will ever get that opportunity again... Musicsongbird

What an amazing day... I received such warm welcomes and it was good to be home... I am still getting settled in to my new work space, but I have put up my name plate, my Norway Flag and my beautiful shadow box given to me by my Typhoon Training family... It was a crazy morning meeting a lot of the Food and Wine cast and getting organized and learning about my new areas.... This afternoon I had the opportunity to return to my Safety role and facilitate Safety in Motion for a group of our new F&W cast... While heading over to facilitate I ran into a group of my training buddies that I haven't seen in months and all I could do was throw my hands out and belt out my best Babs singing, "I've come home.....at last......" Which resulted in many hugs and welcome homes... I had an amazing time doing SIMs and just had an over all good day... Now I just wish I didn't feel sick... :(  I hate congestion and phlegm... Musicsongbird