The 5oz Foodie

Sometimes choosing to forgive someone for something they never apologized for is the hardest thing we can do... As I am going through this healing process I have had so many emotions and most of them have been directed at myself... But last week, my emotions were finally directed towards the one that did all of the damage and as hard as it is, knowing full well that I will NEVER get an apology from him... I had to forgive him... The only way I can get through my healing is by forgiving the one that did the damage and knowing I will never allow someone to hurt me like that again... I was talking to Mom on the way home from the Pin Doc today, about when I was younger and how I never made it through a slumber party until I was in the 6th grade, I think... I would get to the point in the sleep over where we were getting ready for bed and then I would start to get upset and they would have to call my house and have someone come up the street to get me... We never understood why until now....

Why do we hold on to hurtful feelings like, hate and jealousy? I am the queen bee when it comes to this. I wasted nearly 20 years of my life harboring resentful jealous feelings towards a person that didn't deserve it. I have missed out on a potentially great friendship because of my own behavior.  I feel horrible for ever feeling this way towards another person. It's crazy I can choose to forgive someone who did a horrible thing to me when I was a child but I can't forgive someone else that was just living their own life?  I'm sure some money hungry shrink somewhere is thinking that they could make mega money off of my story of lunacy. Everyone always says that when you have a problem that controls your life you have to hit rock bottom before you can look up to find your way out of the hole you are in. Love, peace and forgiveness Musicsongbird

I had a pretty good day today. I was teaching the safety class at work and during my first class one of my co trainers sat in for a bit. Afterward she told me how much she loves to see me teach, how I can make a class as boring as Safety seem interesting and enjoyable and memorable.  Then following my second class, one of the international cast members stayed behind. She said, "I want to tell you and I mean this very much. You are my idol. I want to be like you. You are always smiling and having fun. You make great jokes and you made the class fun." She went on to ask if I am sensitive. I thought it was a strange question, then she went on to say that being sensitive is bad.  I explained to her that I am sensitive to the needs of others, that in the past I was much more emotionally sensitive to what others would say to me, but through the jobs and experiences I have had, I have had to grow a toughness, like a shell, to protect myself from things others may say. I try to no...

Forgiveness is never easy but in the end after the battle within ourselves to forgive that person has won and we can look back on the experience as part of our life then we are truly free. For so long I always felt like the words I am sorry, were so hard to say, but in actuality the hardest words to say to someone is, I Forgive you. Anyone can take the blame to end a fight or to make things better but to forgive someone for hurting you or disappointing you is so much harder, because when we forgive we should also forget. Of course we are only human and most of us have a hard time forgetting especially when you go through something traumatic or heartbreaking, but if you forgive that person and let go of that pain and hurt and move on it will get easier.  Each day gets easier for me and to forgive the monster is a hard thing to do, but if I want to truly find happiness in my life, I have to let go and forgive because if I don't move forward, what he did will always contro...