2015...8.18

I don't know which way is up right now... A lot of internal struggle going on... Work is fine for once... Things slowing down... Starting to make sense... But personally coming to many conclusions in my mind after a great staycation with the SIL... Sister in Law... Thoughts about personal fears and such, things I am not really ready to reveal... Not feeling confident in how much I truly wish to share...

Another wall I must learn to go over, or better yet bust through but this one is going to need huge dynamite... This one is going to need something even bigger than what it took to realize that I am a survivor... 

Because admitting you are a survivor is one thing, facing fears that come with being one is a whole new journey...

On top of it I am dealing with emotions over another situation involving someone near and dear that I want to talk to them about something but am afraid to broach the subject because I feel as though they already know how I feel but I don't think they are ready to truly discuss what they are feeling so all I can do is patiently wait until they are ready... And hope they feel as though they will confide in me and come to me when they feel the time is right for them...

So for now, please be patient my lovely friends and be ready when I need you...

musicsongbird

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day 649...Year 2 #RememberingCory

Tonight the TV show Glee memorialized Finn Hudson, who had been played by actor Cory Montieth, until his death this summer... I was a beautiful tribute to the character of Finn... The music was incredibly heart wrenching and I'm sure I am not alone when I say that I cried from the moment Mercedes' music began until the screen went to black at the end of the episode... I admire the writers of Glee for how they handled his passing, by not putting a name to it's cause; despite everyone knowing the actual cause of Cory's death... I know the cast were following their scripts, but I believe their emotions were true... The one thing I wish they would have played was a montage of Finn's character, perhaps with "Don't Stop Believing" as the background music... That was the song that started it all for the show and I believe it is the one everyone that is a fan remembers the most... This show allowed us as fans, a true opportunity to mourn Cory's pa
Read more

Day 159 of 366

Image
So, the phonelines are down at my house so no internet but thamlfully my phone is cooperating with me. so this may come as a shock to some but I started seeing an acupuncturists last week to help me with my sinus problems. I can hear some of the critics now saying I'm going against my beliefs but I believe it takes just as much space to trust in eastern medicine as it does in western medicine, besides I believe that God led me to a place that can finally help me feel better without having to take all of those medicines all the time. since december I have been to the doctor every month at least once a month for a sinus infection, in the past week I have slept so well and I am finally breathing better. I thank God everyday for bringing this place to my attention and for allowing me to trust this was the right move for me. what I am learning from this is that when you focus on taking care of 1 party your body many times it will also help another part of your body. just like when y
Read more

A new chapter

This has been an incredible year a half since I  began my bariatric journey and it is far from over...that is why it's a journey and not a race because there really is no end. Each day is about the choices we make and how they pan out. I will be the first to say that not all of my choices are correct but I try and learn from those decisions and move forward yet there are still lessons I have to go through over and over before it clicks. One of those being my love of food. You would think that bariatric surgery fixes that but the only thing that fix anything is making a decision to be better. All surgery does is makes your stomach smaller but even that cant fix your problems. Yes I have lost a tremendous amount of weight in a short time but I also had to decide to change how I eat. Yes, my tiny tummy talks to me and tells me what does and doesnt make it happy but if I choose not to listen and listen to my cravings, yes I still have them, I pay the price over and over.... Like
Read more